UNWANTED BABIES

I visited an orphanage home recently and realised that most of the babies are not really orphans but abandoned.  I looked at them and realised that no matter how wonderful the care they are receiving at the home, they can never get that special love and affection that can only be dished out by a mother to her child. So, i started wondering two things, would it have been better if they were never born than be in this situation; and a mother who aborted a developing foetus (not yet a baby) or that who gave the baby a chance to be born into the world yet went ahead to dump in place were the child has low likelihood of survival which is worse?

Let us take the first one. Is it better for the babies not to have been born than to be born and abandoned? If they were never born, they never saw the light of day, were probably not more than a clot of blood before they were terminated. So they know no pain.  If they are born and abandoned, they have a good chance of survival and of someone picking them up and giving them a chance of a good life.  At the same time, because most of them are dumped in places like canals, refuse dumps, gutters and zipped up inside a big bag, they would go through tortured time. Where they cry out of hunger, suffocation and we have seen a case of a baby being eaten alive by pigs before she was picked up on the third day. Now, that child, no matter the type of surgery that will be given, the scar will remain and God know what other damage would have been done internally. In some cases, the babies eventually die. Abandoned babies live with the stigma for the rest of their lives and may have permanent low self esteem because they cannot understand why their mother would not want to have them.

Now let us analyze the two different mothers. The one who aborted the growing foetus and the one who had the baby but abandoned the child.  The one who aborted the growing foetus never gave the child a chance to live. Maybe if she had that child and abandoned somewhere, the baby would atleast get to live and become someone important in future.  She acted selfishly and could not give up just nine month of her life to have that innocent baby.  At the same time, she knows already she does not want the baby and would end up having a child she does not love or want so she decided to spare the child the agony of living and existing as an unwanted child. That is why she made sure she terminated the pregnancy early enough before it was fully developed.

The mother who had the baby but went ahead to abandon the baby not caring what happens in the end to that innocent life who has no clue as to what her crime is. If you went ahead to carry a growing baby in your womb and at the end you abandon the child in a terrible state because you do not want the baby, of course most of the time, it is because you wish the baby does not exist so you are hoping he/she dies.  The fact that this mother did not terminate the pregnancy does not mean she cared about the baby; it could only be that she is too scared of having to go through the aborting process, meaning she is as selfish as the first mother. Why have a child yet you careless as to what type of life the child ends up having. You leave the baby at the mercy of worms, snakes, and the likes even at the risk of being run over by a moving vehicle-in the case of ones dropped on a highway-and you say you have given the baby a chance to live? Even if they are lucky enough to get picked up and survive, they can never enjoy any special love from any woman. At least not the type they could have enjoyed from a mother.  However, the mother who has gone ahead to have this baby, even if she ends up abandoning him/her, has chosen to give the child a chance of survival. At least no matter the circumstances surrounding its being picked up, the bottom line is that he/she survived and gets to grow up and become whatever she/he likes.  They could be lucky to get adopted by wonderful ‘parents’ who would appreciate them and love them like theirs.

Now the above are entirely my opinion. I would like to read from you. What are your views? Who is the cruel mother here? Which is the unlucky child or as d case maybe, unborn child?

TALENT OR HOBBY

This is the first post of a random writter so it is expected to be random. :D. Tola famakinwa, get off my back!

Between our primary and secondary school days, some of us had a ‘talent’ or two which we were praised for either by our teachers, parents or peers.  As a result, we saw ourselves in the future being famous for something in that line. Most of the time, these were more of hobbies than talents but of course every parent believed they have future stars as children. Stop. Think. Which were yours? For me, i remember vividly my numerous talents (or were they simply hobbies? I cannot say for sure now). Hahaha. Was it just me or every kid who at every interval of two years changes goal and ambition? i just really had many things I felt and believed i was good at therefore i had various perceived future faces. Hmnn. 

First, it was my leadership quality. Now this kept on till my final year in the secondary school.  The baffling thing right now is, if i was such a great leader, what relegated me to a great follower in my university days? Did i meet greater leaders or all i had was charisma and not leadership quality? I wonder.

So, the second ‘talent’ came right when i was just in my primary 5. Wow! She is so fast on the tracks. Hahaa.  Of course, i have no trophy to show for this ‘talent’ which continued through to my 5^th year in the secondary school.  Mostly because when i had to go and represent my school, i usually do not fall within the fastest three. And the few times i did, ‘the gift belonged to the school’. It took alot of ‘failed’ races to realise i could only do the shortest sprints. Now that is disappointing.

This third ‘talent’ surfaced in my final year in the primary school. The writing skill! Now, i still am not sure if this is a hobby or a talent because this is one that has succeeded in sticking till now.  If you ask me, i see it more as a hobby because i derive so much pleasure and relief from emotional stress by putting my thoughts down on paper. Oh, i will not forget to say one set back in this, when i start off, i am usually unable to type a conclusive line. Frustrating! Hey, before this discourages you, not to worry, i will somehow succeed in concluding this already long post of mine.

I cannot forget to mention the public speaker part. Haahaa. Yes o. That also one of my ‘talents’. I became a ‘future presenter’.  Up until recently, i was still hoping one day i will anchor a TV programme.

Did i mention that i am also a counsellor? Believe it or not o, i am. I can’t stop laughing just putting this down as i remember each. My days in camp, I even trained as a peer educator trainer. I never put that into use. I just kept telling myself, someday, I will have a pre-university centre for teenagers. Well, somehow, maybe this will still come to pass.

If I keep writing I will not stop because i know i grew up having many ‘talents’ or were they just hobbies? Or dreams?

So, let’s hear yours. Am sure we have some of you with a few ‘neglected’ talents...or hobby. Wink*.

The purpose of this is to find out if my readers remember having ‘talents’ that they simply can’t find anymore. Also, let us help our kids to pick out and differentiate between talents and hobby so that we help them develop the talents and encourage them in their hobbies rather than make them believe they have all these talents and in the process of aiming at so many goals end up letting go of a key talent that they would have been famous for.