LADIES, DO YOU HAVE FOD?..... when she never orgasms

The inability of a woman to reach orgasm is actually a medical condition called orgasmic dysfunction. It is also referred to as Female Orgasmic Disorder (FOD). This lack of response affects the quality of the woman's sexual experiences. To understand this disorder, it is first necessary to understand the physiological changes that normally take place in a woman's body during sexual arousal and orgasm. When a woman is sexually excited, the blood vessels in the pelvic area expand, allowing more blood to flow to the genitals. This is followed by the seepage of fluid out of blood vessels and into the vagina to provide lubrication before and during intercourse. These events are called the "lubrication-swelling response." Body tension and blood flow to the pelvic area continue to build as a woman receives more sexual stimulation; this occurs either by direct pressure on the clitoris or as pressure on the walls of the vagina and cervix. This tension builds as blood flow increases. When tension is released, pleasurable rhythmic contractions of the uterus and vagina occur; this release is called an "orgasm." The contractions carry blood away from the genital area and back into general circulation.  However, for someone suffering from FOD, sexual arousal and lubrication occur. Body tension builds, but the woman is unable or has extreme difficulty reaching climax and releasing the tension. This inability can lead to frustration and unfulfilling sexual experiences for both partners.  Also, lack of orgasm can cause anger, frustration, and other problems in the relationship.

It is normal for orgasms to vary in intensity, length, and number of contractions from woman to woman. The main symptom of orgasmic dysfunction is the inability to achieve sexual climax. Having unsatisfying orgasms or taking longer than normal to reach climax are also symptoms. Orgasmic dysfuntion does not refer only to sexual intercourse. It also refers to the inability to reach orgasm during masturbation or direct stimulation of the clitoris. 

FOD can be generalized or situation-specific. In generalized FOD, the failure to have an orgasm occurs with different partners and in many different settings. In situational FOD, inability to reach climax occurs only with specific partners or under particular circumstances. FOD may be due either to psychological factors or a combination of physiological and psychological factors, but not due to physiological factors alone.

Physiological causes of FOD include:

• damage to the blood vessels of the pelvic region
• spinal cord lesions or damage to the nerves in the pelvic area
• side effects of medications (antipsychotics, antidepressants, narcotics) or illicit substance abuse
• removal of the clitoris (also called female genital mutilation, a cultural practice in parts of Africa, the Middle East, and Asia)

Psychological causes of FOD include:

• history of sexual abuse, rape, incest
• emotional abuse
• fear becoming pregnant
• fear of rejection by partner
• fear of loss of control during orgasm/performance anxiety
• self-image problems
• relationship problems with partner such as unresolved conflicts or lack of trust (leading to sexual disconnection )
• life stresses, such as financial worries, job loss, or divorce
• guilt about sex or sexual pleasure
• religious or cultural beliefs about sex
• major depression

other underlying factors may include;

• age, especially in women undergoing menopause
• chronic illness
• embarrassment or shyness
• hysterectomy (an operation in which the woman’s uterus is removed)
• medical issues, such as diabetes or neurological disorders

The first step in treating orgasmic dysfunction is talking to your doctor. While it may be embarrassing, it’s the best way to help ensure that you can fully enjoy sexual activity again. Your doctor may refer you to a gynecologist for a follow-up exam

Treatment for orgasmic dysfunction depends on the cause. You may need to: treat any underlying conditions; switch antidepressant medications; try some form of talk therapy;  receive direct clitoral stimulation during masturbation and sexual intercourse.Couples therapy is a popular treatment option. It’s a way for couples to connect better intimately. This can address issues both in the relationship and in the bedroom. In couples therapy, they often assign "homework" that focuses on relaxation techniques, sexual exploration, improving sexual communication, decreasing inhibitions, and increasing direct clitoral stimulation. Individually, a woman might be encouraged to masturbate either through self-stimulation or with a vibrator. In addition, kegel exercises, which improve the strength and tone of the muscles in the genital area, may be recommended.

There are no sure ways to prevent FOD. However, reducing life factors that causes stress can be effective. Seeking counseling or psychotherapy for past trauma, or when problems begin to appear in a relationship can help minimize sexual dysfunction problems. 

Essentially, couples should pay close attention to each other during sexual intercourse and not get selfishly carried away. Your spouse may be suffering from orgasmic dysfunction. 

Reference:  Encyclopedia of mental disorder.